Hot take: Ders is the Best Golfer in History
Ders putts, Stew putts, Ders Putts and BAAANNNGG DERS wins the Prestigious Green Jacket. On Saturday November 7th Ders and Stew battled it out on the course to see who is worthy of wearing the prized Green Jacket in the Kingston Masters. Ders, or in golf terms John Daly in the club house, decided to focus his talents on hitting the golf ball and spent much less time in the clubhouse ordering rounds.
This was a hard-fought battle. On the first hole the boys agreed to take a breakfast hole starting at 1 stoke over. Hole three, a par 3 where stew topped the ball and then sent it flooring over the green on the second shot. Ders took off by hitting a nice chip and putt for par giving him a nice lead of 3. Hole 4 is where the magic happened, Ders the Slicing machine, actually pulled out his driver… Something that no one in the history of golf has ever seen. And O… MY… GOD… did he hit the ball beautifully. A nice 310 yard shot right down the middle of the fairway with Stews drive about 25 yards behind. Hole 5, the par 3 where Ders fully fell apart, shanking his 9-iron shot onto the other fairway, taking a double par and throwing his club further than the ball. He has an excuse though because he had just watched Stew take 37.6 seconds of mediation on the tee box. (Request video proof) Fast forward to hole 9… Ders is up by a whopping 4 stokes and continues to lay the chirps down on Stew... who remains surprisingly calm throughout it all.
Fast forward to the last hole, the game is tied, it’s pitch black and the boys are chirping as much as the flock of geese flying in the distance. The lads both shank their balls into the forest and must take a drop. Ders recovers… Stew does not... at 5:25 pm on November 7th Ders sinks the most beautiful putt (3 yards) any one has ever seen in the history of golf, and he did it with his eyes completely closed. (no, he didn’t but adds a dramatic effect) Ders threw his club with pure excited but was able to calm the emotions down enough for a respectful handshake on the green to end the day. The walk back for Ders was glorious.. thinking about the ingredients he was going to put in Stews drink and even finding his driver that he misplaced on one of the previous holes… Life was gooood.
Losers Challenge:
Honestly, this challenge tops the previous by a lot… Sorry Stew. Watch the video as Aidan makes a nice smoothie mixture of a Wendy’s burger, Siriacha, mayo, pickles, tuna juice, capers, salsa, a stick of butter, and few extra special ingredients. Stew tried his best to keep it all down, but the mixture was just too much after a night out. Check out the video above for golf match and disgusting challenge at the end!
Speaking of outdoor sports: Check out these lads If you’re looking to get some athletic tips and tricks for the winter: GetOutThere